Lose big

Like every other person out there, I spent a few moments reminiscing on 2014. I have also spent the last ten minutes trying to think of an adjective to go before “2014”, you know–to “spice up” my writing, but I have concluded, in defeat, that there is no one word to describe the year that has brought me endless joy and frequent heartbreak. I look back on this year in pure awe (and confusion at moments, if I’m being honest) at where God brought me. I look back on a year where I was humbled, won huge, disobeyed my parents, ran to and from the cross, challenged myself, and lost things I deemed myself worthy of.

I’ve thought of a lot of ways I want to take this post. Considering the fact it is January 8th, it is obviously not time sensitive to New Years. Considering the fact that I love my readers, I am not going to compile a list of what I learned in 2014 because your life is exciting (and I would rather you spend time living it than reading a mind-numbing screen). I also respect those of you who are spending your precious time reading this, so I am not going to list my goals for the year, ask for accountability, and do a hair flip.

This is what I want to tell you. WordPress just gave me a report of 2014. One post has had over 40,000 views in 80 different countries. (I wrote it in 25 minutes.) This past year, this blog has had four times more views than last year and has over tripled the number of followers. (I am not any more exciting than I was last year, probably less exciting if I’m straight-shooting here.)

As someone that used to obsess over numbers, I avoid stats like the plague usually. However, this emailed report brought me to my knees–not because people read my stuff (I am touched that you spend your time here, though). With 25 minutes of my time, over 40,000 people read the name of Jesus. Over 40,000 people got to get a little glimpse of His redemption and why I (and millions others) believe Jesus is everything.

You’re good at something. I don’t know you; I don’t know what it is, but you are uniquely and extremely good at something. Instead of making resolutions this year–instead of obsessing over our weight and what we eat–let’s have a revolution this year. The name of Jesus is wanted and needed. The love of Christ is what people are looking for. Use your ability to run fast, your talent of baking, your super sweet car to serve our God. Bring people to opportunities that will bring them to the cross. Spend your time on something worthy this year. I believe He is the most worthy.

I look back on 2014, and have to fight myself to not stare at my losses–my GPA that lost a notch or two, the marathon I had planned on running, the sleep that I never got, and more substantial things that sting. Yet, when I lost big, I think Jesus won big. I have finally realized that my worth and rock cannot be a sad number that deems how well I test. I was starting to forgo precious morning time to increase mileage, and I realized that I love Him more than I love my joints hitting pavement. When I lost things that I love so dearly here (after time, prayer, asking why, praying again, probably complaining . . .), I clung less to this wobbly earth and looked more to my steady Father. When I lost things that distracted me from the cross, Heaven was winning because I was coming home.

So this year, I pray that you lose. I pray that you let old habits and destructive tendencies stay in the past. I pray you lose time serving, loving, and laughing. I pray that you lose the things that distract your eyes and heart from your Father. It stings. It is painful. And it wrecked me at the time. And now I sit here, wrecked by grace, confident that it is worth it. Lose yourself for Jesus. Stop trying to create yourself, and start looking to the Creator. Let’s all do it together. Let’s start a revolution.

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